The Indianapolis Colts are poised to release their franchise’s all-time leading receiver, Marvin Harrison. Harrison, who trails only Jerry Rice (yes, that Jerry Rice of Dancing with the Stars fame) for most receptions in the NFL, is reportedly making strange noises that sound something like, “I would like to go to Philly and be reunited with my old buddy from Syracuse, Donovan McNabb.”  The only problem with this notion is that Harrison’s college days were sometime around prohibition. Still, Harrison wouldn’t be the first aging wide receiver to find success late in his career… wait, this just in… minor detail, the opposite is true.

Nevertheless, some are arguing that an aging future Hall of Famer like Harrison is an upgrade over any wide receiver the Eagles currently carry. Probably true, although in a battle over who is the best of the Eagles potential plethora of number two starters, the Eagles still don’t come out with a number one, just a bunch of guys who are almost stars and one guy who legitimately earned that title ten years ago.

RM? recommends scooping Harrison for one year– just to make sure he’s as old as he says he is, investing in anti-aging technology, and eventually quoting this article when it all blows up in Andy Reid’s face. This is the safest and most lame plan possible, which means there’s a ninety-percent chance it’s exactly what the Eagles will do. GO BIRDS!