We’re Goin’ to the Super Bowl!
Jun 13th, 2009 | By Freeman Frohlich | Category: News
Like a wave of humidity rolling up the Delaware, a fresh optimism has spread over the City of Brotherly Love. Reports from training camp are that Donovan McNabb, freshly invigorated from a transfusion of tens of millions of dollars, is throwing “lazer” [sic]. New wideout Jeremy Maclin has been confirmed as indeed a wideout, and one drafted by the Eagles. Hank Baskett has impregnated a playmate. Shawn Andrews is laughing because of jokes more than mental instability. Potency abounds.
The media has read the tealeaves and they all say: Super Bowl! Book your tickets! Invest in the Miami insurance industry, because Iggles fans are coming south like a rabid pack of face painted Huns. Or like those dudes in Braveheart. Thunderdome. The Eagles of Death Metal. Death by chocolate.
Like the first forty-eight minutes of a Law and Order episode, Eagles fans want to TiVo through the regular season and get right to the point. We’re looking at you Brady, and your hot wife or whatever, and that baby mama of yours, but mostly you in a “you ready for this?” kind of way. Be intimidated. All that is past is prelude; all that happens between now and next February is as predictable as Cristiano Ronaldo’s syphilis test. The outlook is positive.
I’m already bored with next season’s Superbowl victory. Wake me up when they repeat.
That’s the question. One superbowl is good, but couldn’t they win more? For what we’re paying for seating licenses? I mean c’mon.