Philadelphia, PA - Former Receiving Me? Editor and Chief, Bernard Bygott, will begin a new reign of terror over Receiving Me?’s vast corner of the blogosphere upon appropriation of reliable internet access. Over the past two months, loyal readers of Receiving Me? surely noticed several changes in the editorial standards and picturesque layout one comes to expect from a truly great publication such as the one you are reading. Shortly after Bernard Bygott was demoted to Office Coffee Minion, these standards were noticed and summarily rejected. Co-founder Leslie Fox, summed up the staff’s new standards, “We have none.” Pates Baroni argued that the new standards were suspiciously similar to the old standards: “Seriously, we have none.” Mr. Fox noted that the subtraction of “seriously”, unlocked a broader interpretation of the editorial code: “‘Seriously’ was really holding us back; I mean, now people have the option to read the code ironically.” Freshman staff writer, Little Lord Faunleroy Walks in Shadow, disagreed, “This code is bullshit, and has nothing to do with me getting laid or doing drugs!” [Editor's assume there is a critique of some merit hidden in that sentence.]

Still, the controversy will likely intensify in coming weeks as Mr. Bygott plans to unveil an even more stringent code by subtracting two more words, thereby leaving the simple editorial standard: “None.” The extremity of this amendment has people talking, “Never heard of that magazine… Who the hell names a magazine in the form of a question?… I don’t have any spare change; leave me alone!”

Despite the trying times, Mr. Fox holds out hope: “We survived Bygott’s tyranny before and we can survive it again. Plus, I’ve sent out a couple of associates of mine to work on his internet access. They also do phone line and kneecap work on the side.”

Receiving Me? was unable to reach Mr. Bygott for comment, via phone or e-mail, and is currently checking the local hospitals (especially those equipped with Wi-Fi) because as Mr. Fox put it, “It might be fun to find him there.”