Some Place Way too Expensive for Any of Us, Hollywood - In a stunning development, John Mayer is reportedly pregnant with Brad Pitt’s child. As of press time, Jennifer Aniston (former lover of Pitt and current lover of Mayer) could not be reached for comment. However, a source close to Aniston claims that the star believes that the child could … [continue]

In an apparent show of solidarity with uber-athlete Michael Phelps, famous people across the globe are releasing incriminating snapshots of themselves smoking pot. Phelps was caught in the act while partaking in America’s favorite pastime at the University of South Carolina last November, but a British tabloid only recently published the photo. (Apparently it was a slow week for Britney.) … [continue]

Some baseball teams actually care about uniform accessories. The New York Mets are no such team. Recently the Amazins unveiled a breathtakingly primitive logo to celebrate their inaugural season in the newly built Citi Field (or “Shitty Field”– as it has promptly been dubbed in Philly). The logo appears to have been designed by a three-year-old with a basic understanding … [continue]

Our subscriber has spoken, and operation “Trust Us, This Is True” continues. The next entry in the series is a scientific analysis of the overall benefit of wasting time with us. Please remember that all if this is very accurate. If readers would like to acquire additional documentation, they are invited to request so in the comments section. In fact, … [continue]

The Deep, Dark Recesses, INTERWEB - Due to the overwhelming success (it happened) of the initial entry in Receiving Me?’s Pro-Readership Propaganda movement, The Board of Director has decided to allow a second entry in the series, so long as the second entry maintains an “equally low standard in creative and artistic accomplishment.” No doubt the board will be thoroughly satisfied… [continue]

Somewhere no one is looking, HERE - Extreme lack of readership calls for extremely truthful advertising. In an attempt to reverse the segregation of Receiving Me? from “people who use the internet”, someone important (who we should all pretend is not me) has initiated operation “Trust Us, This Is True”– an advertising campaign with the core mission of exploring the catastrophic ramifications … [continue]